Fighter Mcwarrior (8-bit theater) vs Michael J. Caboose (Red vs Blue)

 

Here’s a little relic of the internet unearthed for the purpose of versus.

Okay, I know this is a bit of a weird pick, having two fan made characters duke it out and including fan made characters in death battle is a can of worms that I don’t think many people fully understand the consequences of opening.  But I just like this match up because of the goofy nature of both characters.

 

Connections

Both character that come from unofficially parodies of popular video game franchises who debuted in the early 2000s

Both of their series use assets from their respective games (basically fighter is from a sprite comic and caboose is from a machinima)

Both are the morons of their teams and are the main source of comic relief

Yet despite their baffling stupidity both are the best fighters of their teams and maybe even the smartest

Both think that they are best friends with a guy who hates them

 

Animation

 

I think if this were to become an actual fight, I think it should embrace the kookiness of both and their stupidity affects those around them. Especially fighter, you see he follows warhammer ork logic. If he believes something the laws of physics will bend to Fighter’s will. This allows him to do stuff like block anything with his swords including fall damage, turn his swords into chainsaws, use sword chucks (sword nunchuck combo) and finally exist 4 places at once via temporal bullshit. 

 

Set-up

 

So the fight starts out with two fighters in their red and blue bases. We get a bit of dialogue from the other soldiers that both Fighter and Caboose are new recruits and maybe have a scene that reveals that black mage is the reason Fighter is there in the first place as an attempt to get Fighter killed. 

 

Actual Fight

 

I think that the first stretch of the fight should really be less of a fight and more Caboose and Fighter up to their usual shenanigans and only indirectly hurting each before the fight escalates. I imagine a scene where the leader of Caboose’s team tells Caboose to help his teammates, only for him to kill them with a tank. Later Caboose tries to escape Fighter and tries the “If I can’t  see him, he can’t see me” trick and it actually works because of Fighter’s broken logic. However Fighter looks down and goes “oh, a rock” and Caboose immediately looks at Fighter, alerting him of his presence.  There could be a recreation of the iconic worst throw ever, of all time but instead of a wall, its fighter’s sword. This fight could also end with Caboose getting angry and actually tries to attack Fighter, it would be a kind of epic clash.

 

Banter 

 

Let’s be real, given the scientifically impossible stupidity, the dialogue between them would be hilarious. But what I think could add to the experience is watching their teammates react to them and trying to give them orders only for them to screw up. 

 

Music

 

For music, considering we’re having a character from a series called “8-bit theater” who is represented by an nes sprite.  I think it’s only fitting that the music starts with an 8-bit version of the guitar that plays in the beginning of most Red vs Blue episodes. You know the one. If you wanted music representing the 8-bit theater side, the chocobo theme. Why this song in particular? Well, there was a fairly popular dub of sprite comics that used the chocobo theme as its intro.

 

Who Would Win

 

It’s been a while since I’ve read 8-bit theater and I still have finished but going off of what I read and a few respect threads I found on the internet, I am confident that Fighter should win. Let me explain, durability fighter should have Caboose beat or at least matches if you give Caboose the 10 megaton bomb. I’ve lost count of how many times I’ve seen nuclear explosions in 8-bit theater and mind you, I haven’t even finished half of it. Not to mention Fighter has survived some pretty grievous injuries like being stabbed through the head and he was pretty fine. Speed wise I believe Fighter takes it, he was able to run fast enough to kick up a cloud dust.
Strength probably goes to Caboose, but mostly because I don’t remember there being many feats of strength in 8-bit theater. But that wouldn’t help him since Fighter is more skilled and can just block anything Caboose throws at him, and don’t be fooled. Fighter may be an idiot but he is a good fighter. The final nail in Caboose’s coffin is the fact that Fighter outnumbers him, remember how I said Fighter can duplicate himself? This isn’t like the clone jutsu where the duplicates just die in one hit, no, those are Fighters from different points in time, I think. One Fighter could give Caboose a tough time, 4 would be the death of him. 

 

Conclusion

 

I like it. It’s a neat match up with good connection, has the potential for an incredible joke fight and hey we have a good RvB match without Sarge in it. 

 

Otto’s Comments

 

Let me see something real quick…when did 8-bit Theater and RvB start?

 

Oh…2001 and 2003…

 

Their comedy was so funny to me, now they’re just a burning memory…

 

This is another 5/5 matchup like Yu vs Joe Palooka. Early 2000’s good-natured dumbasses from web content created through repurposed video game assets–muwah, chef’s kiss. Ideally this shouldn’t even be a fight. They meet, become friends, and then while clowning around one of them dies. That’s the fight. They kill through friendship. It’s like Karza’s idea but it never turns into an actual fight. The winner doesn’t even realize he’s killed the other one.

 

Caboose is probably the one that’s going to die. He seems a little more fragile than Fighter and a lot less weird. Fighter has low-grade reality warping and temporal clones. That should be enough for him to take the win…or you know, as close to a win as this kind of situation would allow.